


Dear Harmonizers

by Lexys23



Category: Fifth Harmony (Band)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-30
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-19 09:29:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17598683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lexys23/pseuds/Lexys23
Summary: The brain is such a fragile thing.





	Dear Harmonizers

**Author's Note:**

> Originally, this was going to be a completely story. But I couldn’t finish it. Like I had like two hundred words I would re-write and re-write again. And then I started reading other fanfictions, Game of Thrones (Sansa-Jon stories), Riverdale (Choni of course, I don’t really watch the show, just skip to their scenes or don’t watch at all), and Supergirl, (Supercorp, duh.) And a Supergirl story gave me an idea for this story.
> 
> But this story is medically incorrect, but this is fanfic, so sue me if you don’t like it. It’s not real, and it’s not meant to be real. So if you’re looking for realness, go find something else to read. And if those of you are willing to use your suspension of disbelief, keep on reading.

 

Normani looked around the room. She had been waiting for her roommate to return. Rolling her eyes, she got up from her hotel room bed and went looked out in the hall. She let out a small chuckle when she saw Lauren standing in the hall, looking confused.

“Forgot where we are staying?” Normani asked, leaning against the doorway.

Lauren gave her a grin. “Yeah, sorry, I’m just so tired.”

“Get in here loser,” Normani told her, signaling into the room.

Lauren nodded, and walking towards the room. Once inside, she froze in the middle of the room. Normani could see her looking from one bed to the other.

“You’re really tired?” Normani asked, pointing to the bed closest to the door.

Lauren let out a small chuckle, her hand running through her hair. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

Normani watched as Lauren prepared for bed. Lauren fell asleep. Normani fell asleep after her, not knowing what the future held.

-

“Did you sleep at all last night?” Ally asked, seeing how tired Lauren looked. Her green eyes had dark circles under them.

“A bit,” Lauren answered, yawning a bit.

“You can sleep after the interview,” the mother of the group said, signaling for Lauren to get up.

“We have an interview?”

“Yeah, we talked about it yesterday, don’t you remember?”

Lauren seemed to searched her mind before nodding. She let out a small laugh. “Sorry. Guess not sleeping well fucked my memory more than I thought.”

“No more Tumblr at night,” Ally told her, laughing.

“I don’t even go on Tumblr as much. But you got it mom,” Lauren joked, going to prepare for the interview.

Once in front of the interviewer, Dinah and Camila started to talk about the new album. Normani would answer when asked, or the younger two would stop talking. Ally was content watching the three girls. Lauren on the other hand seemed distracted.

“And you Lauren, what do you like best about this album?”

Lauren blinked a few times. “Uh, I like how it’s our first.”

The other girls frowned. The interview laughed. “Are you trying to erase Reflection from you mind?”

Lauren smiled and shrugged. Ally and Normani exchanged looks.

Something was going on.

-

“Where are we getting off?” Ally asked, driving the car. Lauren was in the passenger seat and the other three were in the back seat. The five girls decided to take a car and go to a restaurant. Lauren was in charge of navigation.

“Uh,” Lauren started, blinking. Dinah could see her zoom in on her phone. She started to bring the phone closer to her eyes.

“Damn girl, do you need glasses?”

“Sorry, my eyes must be tired,” Lauren told them, handing the phone to Camila, who was sitting in the middle.

Camila started to tell Ally where to go. Dinah kept her eyes on the girl in the passenger seat. She was rubbing her eyes.

Before Dinah could ask about if Lauren was okay, Normani asked Ally to put the volume up on the radio. It was one of their songs. They all started to sing along with it.

-

“ _I ain't worried 'bout nothin'_  
I ain't wearin' na nada  
I'm sittin' pretty, impatient, but I know you gotta  
Put in them hours, I'mma make it hotter  
I'm sending pic after picture, I'mma get you fired

“ _I know you're always on the night shift_  
But I can't stand these nights alone  
And I don't need no explanation  
'Cause baby, you're the boss at home”

When it was time for Lauren to start the chorus, she froze. She looked at Camila with panic in her eyes. Camila could see her start to breath quicker. She knew a panic attack was coming.

The band stopped playing. The crowd quieted down. Camila could hear Lauren’s sharp breathing. “I-I don’t,” Lauren whispered, shaking her head. Camila grabbed Lauren’s hand and pulled her off the small chest. While the two walked off, Lauren’s left leg just gave out. Camila gasped as she was pulled back.

The other girl ran to them. They helped both girls up.

“What’s going on Lo?” Dinah asked, looking at the girl.

“Don’t know,” Lauren answered, shaking her head.

Camila looked at Normani. “We have to tell them something. We promised them a show, and we can’t give them one right now.”

Normani nodded. She went off to the stage. Camila and Dinah helped Lauren back to their dressing room, helping her sit down.

“I’m scared,” Lauren whispered, looking at Camila with tears in her eyes.

“We’ll figure this out. Don’t worry.”

-

“Creutzfeidt-Jakob disease,” the doctor told Clara and Michael.

Ally had called them, saying that they were going to Miami and that something was happening with Lauren. She told her about how they thought Lauren needed to go to the hospital.

The doctor has asked Lauren questions. She had been able to answer a lot of them, but the ones that she didn’t were worrisome. Like what year Fifth Harmony was formed. Blood was drawn, there was an MRI and other tests were done. Lauren had looked so small. After the tests were taken, Lauren was allowed to go home. It wasn’t until Lauren’s leg gave out and she slammed her head that they got the answers they wanted.

Clara looked at her daughter who was asleep on the bed. She looked so young, so innocent.

“What is that?” Mike asked, tensing up.

Clara reached over and grabbed her husband’s hand. She knew it was hurting him, knowing his first-born was sick. Out of all his kids, he connected the most with his eldest. And seeing her, in the hospital bed, it caused him pain.

“It’s is similar to dementia, and leads to death. I’m sorry,” the doctor told the parents. “It usually affects people over 60, but there are a few rare cases.”

“Is there a cure? A way to slow it down?” Mike asked, tears in his eyes.

The doctor shook his head. “No.”

Clara let out a sigh. She could feel the knot in her throat. She looked at the doctor. “How long?”

“With the way things are going, less than a year.”

“Can we take her home?”

The doctor nodded his head.

Clara and Mike went to the sleeping girl.

-

_To Our Harmonizer,_

_We want to thank you for all the support and the love you have given us. We are sorry to say that until further notice, Fifth Harmony will be taking a hiatus. At this time, we have to take a break for ourselves. Our album will be dropping as scheduled, but we will not go touring. We will not be taking a promo tour, or have any shows._

_At this moment, we cannot disclose the reason for this small break._

_We can promise that Fifth Harmony will be back. Thank you for everything._

_Love,  
_ _Lauren, Dinah, Ally, Normani and Camila_

“Perfect,” Normani muttered, nodding her head. She passed the phone so everyone could read it and add whatever they wanted.

“Should we tell them?” Lauren asked, her hand grabbing the phone.

“I don’t think we should right now,” Ally answered, taking the phone and took a screen shot of the note to post on their band social media accounts.

“Are you sure this is okay? Cause there is no going back,” Camila said, looking around the group.

Lauren shrugged. “It’s fine for me.”

Ally nodded and posted it online. She closed the app as quickly as she could, not wanting to see the responses.

She still remembered when she found out about Lauren’s disease. She cried for hours. She didn’t think she was ever going to stop.

She looked at Lauren, who was tapping her nails on the table. She looked nervous.

“How are you feeling?” she asked, reaching over to touch Lauren’s hand.

Lauren’s eyes went from her hand to her eyes. “I-I’m scared.”

“Lauren,” Normani whispered, her eyes filling with tears.

The girl looked away. Ally felt Lauren’s fingers twitch. “I-I’mma die.”

Ally looked away.

“I-I don’t want it to, to,” Lauren started, her tears slipping out of her eyes.

“Lolo,” Camila whispered, standing up. She walked to the girl. Lauren looked up at her. Ally closed her eyes when she heard Lauren start to sob. Ally opened her eyes to see Lauren being hugged by Camila. Dinah and Normani stood up and wrapped her arms around the girl.

“We’re family Lo,” Ally whispered, joining the hug. “We’re gonna be here with you.”

-

“I don’t wanna be alone when I die,” Lauren whispered one day, looking at Normani.

Normani smiled and gently rubbed Lauren’s scalp, her hand running through Lauren’s hair. “Never. We’re here for you to the very end.”

Lauren’s arm just twitched. The green-eyed girl looked down at it. “Can we do something?”

“Like what? Do you want to invite the other girl?”

“Y-y,” Lauren tried, but seemed was unable to say the word.

“I’ll let the girls know while you decide,” Normani whispered, getting her phone out to text the other girls.

The other girls arrived, sitting around the room.

“Why don’t we all go get an early dinner?” Ally suggested, shrugging her shoulders.

Lauren nodded. “C-can, uh-“ Lauren looked up in fear. Tears started to appear. “I-I don’t remember.”

“Lauren,” Camila whispered, trying to get the girl’s attention.

The girl started to breath heavily. “I-I don’t, names. What are, their names?”

“Who Lo? Who are you trying to remember?”

Lauren let out a sob. “My brother and sister.”

Normani wrapped her arm around the girl. Lauren leaned into her.

“Shh, it’s okay,” Normani whispered.

Lauren rubbed her eyes. “I can’t sleep,” Lauren whispered, closing her eyes. “I’m so tired.”

Normani started to sing the first song that came into mind. The other girls joined in. They sang two songs before Lauren fell asleep.

“It’s going to keep getting worse,” Normani whispered. “We’ll have to stay strong, for her.”

The other three girls nodded. “For her.”

-

“Want to watch the movie?” Dinah asked, sitting next to Lauren, who was strangely quiet. It had been a few months since the diagnosis, and things had been getting worse. Lauren’s words would slur at times. There were moments where Lauren eyesight would get blurry. Her limbs jerked more, and everyone knew she was embarrassed about it, so no one commented on it. Lauren barely got any sleep at times.

That wasn’t even the worst part for them. These moments were the worst.

Dinah turned to look at Lauren, who was staring at her. She had confused look on her face. Dinah could feel her tears well up, knowing what was happening. It didn’t matter how many times that happened, but it always hurt the same.

“Lo?” Dinah whispered, her voice soft. “It’s me, Dinah. I’m one of your best friends, remember?”

Lauren blinked for a few seconds before nodding her head. But she still looked confused.

“Let’s watch the movie, yeah?” Dinah whispered, trying to smile.

The haze Lauren was in vanished, and she seemed to remember. “Lion King?”

Dinah smiled. “Of course.”

-

Normani sighed, staring at her coffee.

“She won’t let anyone in,” Clara said, taking a seat at the table. The mother seemed tired. Normani could only wonder how she felt. What she could stand there and act like she was okay, when her first child was at death’s door.

Camila rubbed her eyes. Her eyes seemed really puffy. Normani knew that her own eyes looked like that, hell they felt forever puffed up. She didn’t remember the last time she went to bed without crying.

“Should we tell them? Lauren told us that we should,” Dinah whispered, her notes on her phone opened.

Normani sighed. Lauren had wanted them to continue with the band, saying that it helped her growing up, just like it helped many people growing up. She told them that she believed the band would help the four girls move forward. She made them promise.

Normani nodded her head. She watched Dinah struggle to start it. So she took the phone and just typed. She typed until she couldn’t see. She typed until she sobbed.

Camila took the phone from her and hugged her.

“It’s not fair,” Normani cried, shaking her head.

“I know,” Camila whispered, rubbing her back. She felt the other girls stand up and join in on the hug. “But we still have each other.” She looked at Clara, who was just watching. “All of you.”

_Dear Harmonizers,_

_It’s been months. And we haven’t forgotten. Thank you all for supporting us as we tried to figure out our lives. Many of you have heard rumors. You have seen pictures. And with her family’s permission, we’ve decided it’s time to tell you all the truth. You deserve it._

_A few months ago, we found out that Lauren was sick. She has a rare brain disorder. It’s not looking so great._

_Please keep Lauren and her family in your prayers._

_Love,  
_ _Dinah Jane, Camila, Ally, Normani_

-

Ally walked into the room, a small tray in her hands. Lauren had started to struggle with communicating with them. It was getting harder for them to take care of her. She and everyone else knew it was getting closer to the time.

Lauren was lying in bed, facing the door. The girl jumped up when she saw Ally walk in. Ally gave her a smile, which was wiped off when she saw Lauren move away.

“Lo?”

The other girl started to breath heavily. She moved back.

“Lauren, it’s me Ally,” the girl whispered, moving closer to her bandmate,  _former_  bandmate.

Lauren let out a whimper. She shook her head. Ally could feel her own panic appear. She looked away from Lauren.

“I’m your friend Lo. You may not remember who I am, but I’ll never forget who you are,” she whispered, smiling. She looked down at the food in her hands. “C’mon, it’s time to eat.”

Lauren stared at Ally, a small frown on her face. She slowly inched closer to Ally.

Ally knew they were going to lose Lauren. It was just a matter of time. She looked down at the soup. She was going to be okay.

She had to be.

-

Camila looked around. She could see everyone around them. Lauren had started to struggle to breath. Camila could see the tube that was stuck down her throat. It had been weeks since it was shoved in her. Any brain activity had ended shortly after.

Camila knew why they were all there. She knew it was time to say their goodbyes.

Camila looked at Ally, Normani, Dinah, who were holding each other. She looked at Taylor, who looked broken. Chris was tensed up, his hands into fists. Clara was leaning into her husband. Camila looked at Lauren, who looked like she was sleeping.

She had watched as Ally held Lauren’s hand, telling her how much she loved her and how much she was going to miss her. She talked about how much she wished things were different. She talked about moments she had shared with Lauren. She placed a kiss on Lauren’s cheek.

Dinah called Lauren 'Lauser' one last time, smiling. She talked told her about how grateful she was for having an older sister like Lauren. How Lauren taught her to be a stronger woman. She said that she would never forget what she learned. She kissed Lauren’s cheek.

Normani didn’t say anything for a second. She just stared at Lauren, as if she was trying to remember the last time she’d see her. And it was. Normani leaned down and kissed Lauren’s forehead. She moved back and smiled. She told Lauren she loved her. That there would never be another person like her. How she was one of a kind. She will never forget her and that she was going to make her proud.

Camila was next. She didn’t think she could do it. She clenched her teeth, staring at the girl. She could feel her tears, the knot in her throat begging to escape. She gripped Lauren’s hand. She gently kissed her hand.

“I love you Lo. You were my idol growing up. You were so carefree and sweet. You didn’t seem to care what people said and spoke up about things that you cared about. You gave me my first kiss so I’d know it was someone who loved me. I’m so glad my first kiss was with you,” she whispered, her hand playing with the ends of Lauren’s hair. “I-I know we started to grow apart, but I always loved you. You helped me become stronger, to speak up for myself. I’m never going to forget that. I’m never going to forget the fun we had, the jokes we had. I’m never going to forget your smile, your green eyes.” Camila leaned over and gently kissed Lauren’s lips. “I know you’re going to be the brightest star shining down on us.”

Chris went next. He sat down and just talked about his memories. He talked about how Lauren’s singing made him feel. About how he was always scared of living under her shadow, but that it only made him want to try harder. He talked about how he wished he was a better brother. He promised that he would be there for their younger sister for the both of them.

Taylor barely said anything. She just cried while hugging Lauren. She kept repeating that she loved her. That she didn’t want her big sister to go. No one stopped her. They just watched as she cried.

Clara whispered to her daughter. She talked about being excited to have her first child. About how she was proud of everything she ever did. She talked about how she worried about her. She just talked and talked. Camila wondered about how she was feeling. She remembered watching movies where mothers cried for their lost child. She remembered how that made her heart clench. But it was nothing compared to seeing it in real life. Seeing Clara try to be strong until the last moment. She was still trying to be a mother.

But the worst was Lauren’s father. He could barely get a word out. Growing up, Lauren had always been daddy’s girl. Camila could see how it was killing him. His tears, his pain, his anger, it was all there. Camila could just watch him try to not break. She heard him whisper her name, calling him her baby. She watched him kiss the top of her head. His eyes closed, trying to remember feeling his daughter in his arms one last time.

The doctor came in. When he got the nod, he turned the machines off.

Camila listened to the slow  _beeps_. She closed her eyes, thinking to Lauren that they were all going to be okay. That they were going to be okay. When it happened.

There was a long  _beeping_  sound. Lauren was gone.

Camila thought she was prepared. She knew it was coming. But it still felt like her heart was ripped out of her chest. Looking around, she saw that she wasn’t the only one feeling that way.

Taylor let out a cry, hugging her mother. Chris let out a curse and punched the wall. Mike grabbed him and wrapped his arms around her. Ally leaned into Normani. Camila felt Dinah pull her into her arms. She let out a shaky breath.

“She’s gone Dinah,” Camila whispered, her eyes never leaving Lauren’s body.

“I know,” Dinah told her, holding her close.

“What are we going to do?”

-

_Dear Beloved Harmonizers,_

_Last night we lost one of our own. We wish we were writing this for other circumstances. But the world doesn’t work that way. We know a lot of you are feeling broke. You’re feeling sad, angry, hopeless. And it’s okay, because we are too._

_Lauren was our sister, our best friend. She was a part of us in ways we didn’t know. And she was someone you all looked up to. Someone you guys loved as well._

_All we ask for is for all of you to remember the happy times. Remember the videos, the songs. The answers she gave. Remember how you’d smile seeing her, hearing about her. She was one of a kind. Stand together. Lauren would want you all to live in happiness. She would want all her fans to be who they are. Help each other. Love each other; it’s all she would have wanted._

_We love you. And we love Lauren._

_Love,  
Ally, Dinah, Camila, Normani, The Jaureguis_

-

Mike couldn’t go anywhere without hearing about his baby girl’s passing. Hashtag RIP Lauren Jauregui was trending. Thank You Lauren Jauregui was trending. Articles were written about her passing. He read many stories from fans that talked about how Lauren helped them in some way. He laughed at Takeover videos, seeing his daughter act like the goof she was. He looked at the pictures of his daughter smiling.

He tossed his phone, staring around the room. His daughter had just been buried. He had to say words about her. He barely got a word out. All he wanted to do was fall on his knees and beg for God to return his daughter. But he got through the funeral. He got through everything. And now, he just fell empty.

Not just empty, he was angry. No father should burry their child. No parent should live longer than his or her child.

He was hurt. He could still remember holding his daughter in his arms for the first time. He could remember her first step. The first time she called him daddy. How she held on to him on her first day of school. How she threw herself into her arms after her audition.

He could feel himself start to cry. He doubled over, tears creating rivers on his face with how much he was crying.

That was how Clara found him sobbing, begging for his little girl to come back. All she could do was sit with him and cry.

-

_Two Years Later_

Camila, Dinah, Normani and Ally announced that Fifth Harmony would make a comeback. And they did. They released their first song as a foursome, it did well in the charts, but the girls didn’t care about it because they released it for the fans that had been waiting.

“Since it’s just four of you, will you be changing your name to Fourth Harmony?” an interviewer asked.

Normani leaned forward, letting the other girl that she would be answering the questions.

“We started out as five of us. Our fans gave us our name. And even though it’s just four of us, Lauren will always be with us. Lauren will always be the fifth member, and this is our way of honoring her memory,” Normani answered, smiling at the other four girls.

The interview seemed to take a moment to clear his throat. “How are you doing? Really?”

“We’re doing better than we thought we would be. I think I can talk for all of us, but when Lauren, when she passed, we didn’t think we’d be able to do this again. Before it got bad, Lauren had us promise that we would keep going, but I thought we would break that promise. I couldn’t think of continuing without her. Like Normani said, I believed we would start as five and end as five. And it makes it hard at times. I still wake up thinking that Lauren will wait at the studio, only to remember that she’s not,” Ally said, smiling softly.

“You guys released an album, but Lauren was in that. Where did those songs come from?”

“We recorded many songs. And many songs got cut from our old albums. So I thought that maybe we could release those songs so people can still hear her voice. We got to say our goodbyes. The fans didn’t. And this is a way to be able to say goodbye. Most of those songs weren’t finished. But I think that’s what makes it better. You can hear Lauren for who she really was, not whom everyone saw her as,” Dinah told them.

“That last track, why?”

The last track wasn’t a song. It was just a recording that one of the girls took, in one of the moments they were playing around, with Lauren’s laughter being the last thing in the album.

“We just thought it would be a great way to end it,” Camila said, shrugging. “The album was for our fans. For Lauren. We felt like the last thing you hear is Lauren as we would all remember. Not the badass we thought she was. Not the raspy singer. But Lauren, the sweet, puppy girl we knew and love.”

“I was okay through out the song. Cause we’ve all heard songs and albums from artist who passed, but I don’t think any had hit me like LMJ.”

“It’s our favorite,” Normani said, tears in her eyes.

“Have you decided on a name for your new album?”

The girls looked at each other. Dinah smiled. “You know, we wouldn’t be here for our fans. We would still be mourning Lauren. But our fans kept us going, with their stories. So we decided to give them our stories. Our album is for them in a way it never was before. We’re calling it, Dear Harmonizers.”

Since the day they announced that they would be returning, they had changed their band social media icons. It was the two words they would live by. The words they all had tattooed in their hearts.

_for lauren_

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is big One-Oh. How did I do? I’m worried it didn’t live up to the hype.
> 
> The original ten was going to have the usual Camren car crash, but just Lauren. And it was going to go underwater. And she was going to think about her life. How she left things. Her mental goodbyes. And die. But now that I think of it, it would have sucked. So that’s never seeing the light of day.
> 
> If you’re wondering, I’ve killed Lauren ten times in many of my stories. It’s like a running gag I guess.
> 
> #10: Ten: Dear Harmonizers  
> #9: the Superhero one in the Stand Alone One Shots.  
> #8: Numb  
> #7: Anything’s Ending #4: “I Gave Up On Me”  
> #6: Anything’s Ending #2: “You’ll Forget”  
> #5: Anything’s Ending #1: “I Hope I Make You Proud”  
> #4: And I Have Felt the Pain of Losing Who You Are  
> #3: Waiting For You  
> #2: Let Her Go  
> #1: Hold On, I Still Need You (This is open ending, but not for me.)


End file.
